dear friend

WOW... my husband sure can write a blog post, I am almost nervous to follow him and his eloquent words. Dear friends, thank you for the outpouring of support as we become a family of four. From friends in Whitefish to family across the country we have felt the love through your messages, t shirt orders and donations. I have loved running into people and hearing their blessings and excitement for this adventure. This baby is already so so loved by our community, what a powerful and beautiful picture.

I have been thinking a lot about the story of Moses and how his mother pushed him down that river into the waiting arms of Pharaoh's daughter (Exodus 2 if you feel like reading). She believed that God had a life for her son and stepped into the faith that HIS plan was bigger than the next bend in the river.

Was she scared? For sure.

Heartbroken? No doubt. 

Was it hard for her to take her next breath? I can't even imagine. 

But she was even more so brave.

This story has brought me to a place of brokenness for mothers who have lost children through abortion, adoption and death... it is  not the original plan that God had for us and my heart breaks for this broken world.  His plan is for Goodness and sometimes life is anything but good, showing us that the enemy is more real and near than we know. It is so incredibly hard in moments of tragedy when people give you well meaning words like "God wanted this little baby with them" or "we will never understand Gods plan for our life". I have found that through my own tragedy and really studying and digging into the scripture that God's plan never includes death it includes life and life more abundant. He doesn't take babies home or plan to hurt us for some weird growth in our life. No God looks like Jesus, the Jesus who cried for his friends Mary and Martha when their brother died. Who that day I believe wept for me losing Nellie, for you losing a loved one for our broken world. His plan is so good and beautiful and perfect. Our world is not. It is why I can not wait for him to come again.

This story of Moses has also made me think about these brave women who are choosing adoption. The women like Moses's Mother who step out in faith and love. These women are my heroes.

I ask you friends to help me pray for this woman, this brave brave sister, wherever she is. That you would pray protection over her and her family and that she would feel the spirit of the Lord so clearly. That like the Levite woman this mother would feel the strength she needs to send her baby down the river and into our arms.

Thank you all for your love and the joy you bring to us                xoxo Court  

DO GOOD.

I remain confident of this:
I will see the goodness of the Lord
in the land of the living.
Wait for the Lord;
be strong and take heart
and wait for the Lord.
— Psalm 27:13-14

When Courtney and I settled on having these verses read at our wedding, it seemed like a no brainer. It had always been one of Court’s favorites, and it stuck out as an anthem of a hope in things to come, both in our marriage and our lives. When we read these verses together we always assumed (wrongfully, perhaps selfishly) that the “goodness” mentioned was each other: that our happily ever after was the permanent display of God’s goodness in our lives.

How much two years can change things.

Marriage is hard. Finances are tight. We’re both still fallen people living in a fallen world. Some days God’s “goodness” is hard to see. On March 18th, earlier this year, it was impossible to see.

Handing Nellie May back to the nurse for the final time was the darkest moment of my life. Incredibly enough it pales in comparison to what Courtney went through that night. There was no goodness. There was no being strong and taking heart. There was just death.

We can say all the right things, but there’s no escaping the doubt and anger that has crept in since. Cliches are great during coffee with friends, but at night when you’re lying in bed wondering how a God promising goodness could possibly let this happen, they all fall apart. We are four months removed from saying goodbye to Nellie. Nights alone still suck. There’s still nothing to say. And there will never be a good answer.

But like the prodigal son, who finally came to the end of himself in the company of pigs, rock bottom is often where we discover some of God’s more enigmatic qualities. Scanning the Hebrew Scriptures it becomes abundantly clear: David was not the only one waiting to see this goodness in their time. They ALL were. There was an unrest in Israel that pervades every bit of history, poetry, and prophecy we see. Where were the answers? Where was the plan? Where was the goodness?

And then, one cold night in a field outside of Bethlehem, a lone angel appeared to a group of shepherds…

I bring you good tidings… Of great joy… Which shall be for all people.

There was the goodness. The God Man, Jesus. The word become flesh. Come to show the full goodness of God in the land of the living. Come to be the goodness of God in the land of the living.

When God promised us goodness, he’s not promising us good weather, or good health, or good fortune… He promised us himself. Goodness embodied. Love embodied. Hope embodied. The full end, mission, and purpose of all of man portrayed in the life of one: Jesus Christ. God With Us.

2000 years later, we don’t get the benefit of reaching out our hands and touching Him. Of hearing him teach. Of seeing him perform miracles. Of experiencing LOVE and GOODNESS in the flesh. But we have been given a task…

Be the goodness.

Galatians 2:20 says that since we have all been crucified with Christ, we no longer live, but Christ lives in us. The life we live in this body we live by faith in Jesus alone. John writes that true love (true goodness) was emulated by Christ’s death on the cross, and he then challenges all believers to do the same every day of our lives (1 John 3:16).

Nellie May Goodness Baker brought this message to the forefront for Courtney and me. Our lives will never quite be complete without her, but our mission is more clear than ever: Do Good. Be Goodness. Be Jesus.

And that is the challenge of the Do Good. campaign.

For us in this chapter of our lives, doing good is adopting a baby brother or sister for Nellie May. We are excited to be walking through the process of a domestic adoption and can't wait to see where in the USA our little babe will come from. For Courtney doing good is pouring her heart into her volleyball team and loving those girls with all she’s got. For me it’s working to be the best I can be in my ministry, and loving my wife and friends as Christ would.

What’s your Goodness?  -David

We would LOVE to have you join us please click HERE to buy a shirt or to DONATE!

Sunny days

jeans- Levi | shirt- Wildfox from Harlow |bag- TBird Leather | shoes- Target (similar here)

jeans- Levi | shirt- Wildfox from Harlow |bag- TBird Leather | shoes- Target (similar here)

Summer is here, blue skies, flowers and sunshine. Days filled with BBQ's, canoeing, campfires and glasses of crisp Pinot Grigio with friends. It has been 78 days since Nellie May was born and gone and some days it feels like only one has gone by. The day after she was born the sun was shining, I remember walking outside the hospital doors with empty arms and my mind not being able to comprehend the sunshine and warmth on my skin. Even though I felt the world had gone dark and I had been forgotten, there it was reminding me of my worth, a rare sunny day in March. Every morning that I wake up and the sun is shining it reminds me that even on your darkest day their is love and light and faith that can warm you from the inside out.          

Xoxo Court

Photos by Tyler Nicole Photography  

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